Every Grain of Sand...

Well if any of you follow my blog regularly, (I think maybe there's like... ummm... one person other than me who qualifies), you've probably noticed a lack of posting as of lately.  Here's what this means:  I'm lazy.  It doesn't mean I'm busy.  Sadly, I would very much like to be busy, but thanks to the great tranquility of our current economy (sarcasm intended) I've been more or less unemployed and hard hit for money as of the last few months.  On top of that, remember when Paul wrote in the New Testament (as opposed to all of his Old Testament writings I suppose - had to catch that before some of you wise guys did) about having a "thorn in his flesh?"  Yeah?  Well I got one of those... it's called a 1995 Nissan Maxima that has officially been taken into the mechanic for the "last time" about 4 times now over the course of the last 3 months... each time I take it in, I get hit with anywhere from $340 to $1260 in repair costs.  Suffice it to say, Los Angeles eats cars alive with the horrible roads and constant driving everywhere, so yeah, Murphy's Law has been after me for the last few months in regards to my automobile.  For those of you unacquainted with Murphy's Law... well... how should I explain it?... good for you.  Ignorance is bliss.  

So where does this leave me? Well as of today I've applied to a few job posting on craigslist and finally got my car out of the shop for the 4th time.  What I hope this means is that we're about to see a change... and no, I'm in no way referencing or referring to Barrack Obama with that remark.  I'm hoping that starting soon, things will begin to work together for my good.  And here's the catch: I know they will.  How do I know that?  Because a few nights back I read through Ephesians... for those folks who stumbled upon this blog and are scratching their heads, it's in the Bible.  Allow me to explain a little more.  When you read through Ephesians, a few things "oughta' slap you upside the head" as my granddad would say.  First, the precious promises of God.  These aren't earthly promises folks.  They don't get changed, altered, skewered, or come with strings attached.  These are promises made to those whom God loves, to those He has called according to His rich mercy and love.  I'm not always sure of a lot, but one thing I am sure of is this: God loves me.  There's no better explanation for the fact that I'm still breathing.  I know He certainly doesn't have to love me... He doesn't have to love any of us.  But for whatever reason that is beyond my comprehension, God chose me before the foundations of the earth were laid as someone He would love, and I can take that to the bank.  

Reading through Ephesians 2 might be the best remedy ever devised for feeling frustrated and anxious.  It really hammers home a few things: 1) It's not about me... I didn't do anything to earn or gain this favor and love... in fact, I ran from it as an enemy of God.  2) It's all about Him... His grace... His mercy... His love... poured out on undeserving sinners like you and me.  3) There was a terrible cost... his grace doesn't exist apart from his justice... someone had to pay.  That someone was the one person who shouldn't ever have had to, his perfect son, Christ Jesus.  4) It's through these two things: the sheer grace of God and the ultimate costly sacrifice of Christ, that we are in fact reconciled to God... brought into His favor... more than that, we're actually made heirs and family members, adopted into His family! Read Romans 5 if you really want a kick in the head!

So yeah... I'm starting to ramble a little now, and I'm not trying to preach, that's not my area of strength by any means.  I only know that ever since reading through Ephesians, my mind has been consumed with the love of Christ and the power of the gospel, and not as tied up by my current situation out here of not having a job, a perfect car, etc.  Has my situation out here changed?  On the outside, not at all.  But in my soul, I've been reawakened to the beauty of the gospel and God's love for me, and also been rudely awakened to the fact that I need to do a much better job of repenting and confessing and being a good deal more thankful than I am now for what I have been given.  As my understanding of my sin increases, my understanding of God's love, mercy, grace, and righteousness also grows.  Charles Spurgeon once said "If your sin is small, then your Savior will be small also.  But if your sin is great, then your Savior must be great."  Well I know my Savior is great... Ephesians (and the rest of the Bible) screams this with every verse... so what's that tell me about my sin?  Uh yeah... time to hit my knees folks.  I've no more got it together than any of you reading this.  

So yeah... I'm not gonna lie, things aren't exactly fluffy little bunny rabbits and fields of golden daffodils right now, but you know what?  Who said they should be?  If they were, I probably would be living in ignorance right now more than ever.  All this to say, sometimes God uses dark brush strokes to paint his masterpiece, and we can't be scared to face those dark times.  This is still the same God who can silence the wind and waves with a simple command, and as rough as it may get sometimes, He has promised to never let us go... to close, I'd like to call up two songs.  For one, I'm reminded of the children's song I used to sing growing up, "He's Got The Whole World in His Hands"... man, how often do we "grow up" and leave behind our child-like faith when in fact we had the truth and understanding right there in front of us? Seriously... He's got the whole world in his hands folks.  It wasn't like He dropped it when the stocks fell.  It still answers to Him and Him alone, as He is the sole Creator with power of his creation.  It's got the scars of sin, sure, but it's still a beautiful world in many ways... Just because it's dark doesn't mean we should give up.  As long as we're here, we're called to grow.  Yes, this world is not our home, but we're still ambassadors here for the time being, temporarily being used to grow and impact the kingdom of God, and it's time we learned to act as such.  

The other song I'd like to reference I'll simply close with here... the source may not be what you'd expect, but then again, if God could use a talking donkey, then don't be so quick to throw this guy out.  You've probably heard of him... he goes by the name Bob Dylan.  Check out his lyrics to "Every Grain of Sand" below and you may be surprised...  I for one think he hit the nail right on the head here:

In the time of my confession, in the hour of my deepest need

When the pool of tears beneath my feet flood every newborn seed

There's a dyin' voice within me reaching out somewhere, 

Toiling in the danger and the morals of despair.

I don't have the inclination to look back on any mistake

Like Cain, I now behold the chain of events that I must break.

In the fury of the moment I can see the Master's hand

In every leaf that trembles, in every grain of sand.

Oh, the flowers of indulgence and the weeds of yesteryear,

Like criminals, they have choked the breathe of conscience and good cheer.

The sun beat down upon the steps of time to light the way

To ease the pain of idleness and the memory of decay.

As I gaze into the doorway of temptations angry flame

And every time I pass that way I always hear my name.

Then onward on my journey I have come to understand

That every hair is numbered just like every grain of sand.

I have gone from rags to riches in the sorrow of the night

In the violence of a summer's dream, in the chill of wintry light,

In the bitter dance of loneliness fading into space,

In the broken mirror  of innocence in each forgotten face.

I hear the ancient footsteps like the motion of the sea

Sometimes I turn, there's someone there, other times it's only me.

I am hanging in the balance of a perfect finished plan

Like every sparrow falling, like every grain of sand...

Satisfied

All my life long I had panted

For a drink from some cool spring

That I hoped would quench the burning

Of the thirst I felt within

Hallelujah He has found me

The one my soul so long has craved

Jesus satisfies all my longings

Through His blood I now am saved

Feeding on the filth around me

Till my strength was almost gone

Long my soul for something better

Only still to hunger on

Poor I was and sought for riches

Something that would satisfy

But the dust I gathered 'round me

Only mocked my soul's sad cry

Well of water ever springing

Bread of life so rich and free

Untold wealth that never faileth

My Redeemer is to me

It's Been A Long Silence....

For those of you wondering if I feel off a cliff or met my end to one of LA's street gangs, rest assured, I am alive and well... and busy.  Sort of.  While I may not always be working for money, I'm always in some way or another too busy to update my blog.  But don't worry, it's all about to change... check back often!  There will be lots of new posts soon, I promise!

Oscar Predictions

Anyone who knows me well knows that for me, the biggest night in television isn't the Superbowl.  Matter of fact, I pretty much hate the Super Bowl.  No, for me, it's Academy Awards, which of course are lovingly called "The Oscars" by most folks.  This year I've been living near Hollywood, and the buzz around this town come awards season is even more magnificent than it was back home or at college on the East Coast.  I love trying to predict the Academy Awards as well, so now with roughly 12 hours to go before the statues are handed out, I'm gonna post my final thoughts and predictions on most all of the categories.  I'm not even sure if you'll read this before the Awards actually do happen, but here goes: 

Best Picture

What the critics are saying: Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

I've only seen this film in theaters 7 times, so I may be biased, haha, but I'll be darned if there's a better film out there (that also got nominated for Best Picture).  If it had to go up against The Dark Knight or even Wall-E there might be some competition, but I don't see Benjamin Button, The Reader, Milk, or Frost/Nixon putting up much of a fight here.  Expect the "little film that could" to finally get it's due, I'm calling Slumdog by a landslide.  In the event that I'm wrong... Hmm... my second favorite of this bunch is actually Frost/Nixon, but I think if there's a film that could upset Slumdog, it would be Milk due to the political nature of the film and the awards.  And by the way, if that happens, I will be severely upset for some time, because I HATED Milk. 

Best Director

What the critics are saying: Danny Boyle

What I'm saying: Danny Boyle

By winning the DGA he's a safe lock in my opinion based on what little I know of the way the votes are cast.  Plus, he's got the best film of the year (Slumdog Millionaire), and while there are exceptions to every rule, more times than not the film that goes all the way goes hand-in-hand with best director too.  Kinda wish poor Christopher Nolan had been given a chance here... Dark Knight was awesome, and had much better directing than Milk and The Reader for sure...  

Best Actor

What the critics are saying: split between Sean Penn and Mickey Rourke

What I'm saying: Frank Langella

This is easily one of the closest calls in this category that we've ever seen... Call me crazy, but I have a hunch that Frank will get his due for his portrayal of a very unpopular president in Frost/Nixon.  I know the tables are stacked against me as Mickey won the Golden Globe for The Wrestler and Sean won the SAG award for Milk, but everyone thought I was crazy last year as well when I said I thought Marion Cotillard would win Best Actress too.  We'll see... I'm personally unmoved by Sean's performance, but I could easily see any of the three (Frank, Mickey, Sean) taking this one home.  All of this is a real shame for Richard Jenkins, who gave a great performance in The Visitor.  Oh well, it's nice to be nominated, right?

Best Actress

What the critics are saying: Kate Winslet

What I'm saying: Meryl Streep

I'll probably be wrong on this one, but quite simply put, I haven't seen The Reader (and I won't either, I've not heard good things from the majority of my friends whose opinions I trust).  Whenever Meryl is nominated, it's a safe bet to vote for her, and of the performances I've seen, she's the strongest for her role in Doubt.  I did like Changeling a lot, but I'm afraid this won't be Angelina's year. 

Best Supporting Actor

What the critics are saying: Heath Ledger

What I'm saying: Heath Ledger

Do I even need to explain this one?  He's the closest thing to a sure bet you're ever going to get at the Academy Awards for his portrayal of the Joker in The Dark Knight.  If he doesn't win, the world may very well be ending... 

Best Supporting Actress

What the critics are saying: Penelope Cruz

What I'm saying: Viola Davis

A lot has been said about how hard this category is to predict.  That being said, I'm not going to say Penelope Cruz for Vicky Cristina Barcelona and instead say that I thought Viola Davis gave the best one scene performance of any move this year in Doubt.  Will it be enough to get her the Oscar?  We'll see... she may always split votes with co-star Amy Adams and there's always the notorious Marisa Tomei upset for The Wrestler (in my book though, just prancing around in the nude as she does for 90% of her role doesn't equal acting, so she doesn't even deserve the nomination)

Screenplay - Original

What the critics are saying: Milk

What I'm saying: Wall-E

Screenplay - Adapted

What the critics are saying: Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Animated Feature

What the critics are saying: Wall-E

What I'm saying: Wall-E

Best Foreign Language Film

What the critics are saying: Waltz With Bashir

What I'm saying: My heart still says Israel's Waltz With Bashir is probably gonna walk away with this one, but be on the lookout for a little film called Departures from Japan... I'm just saying, it could happen... Also, France has The Class to potentially spoil things

Best Documentary

What the critics are saying: Man on Wire

What I'm saying: Man on Wire

Best Art Direction

What the critics are saying: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

What I'm saying: The Dark Knight

Best Cinematography

What the critics are saying: Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Costume Design

What the critics are saying: The Duchess

What I'm saying: The Duchess

Best Film Editing

What the critics are saying: Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Make-Up

What the critics are saying: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

What I'm saying: Hellboy 2: The Golden Army (because I really want to one day tell someone they should watch "the Oscar winning film Hellboy 2: The Golden Army." Haha)

Best Original Score

What the critics are saying: Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Original Song

What the critics are saying: "Jai Ho" from Slumdog Millionaire

What I'm saying: "Jai Ho" from Slumdog Millionaire

Best Sound Mixing

What the critics are saying: The Dark Knight

What I'm saying: Slumdog Millionaire

Best Sound Editing

What the critics are saying: Wall-E

What I'm saying: Wall-E

Best Visual Effects

What the critics are saying: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

What I'm saying: Iron Man or The Dark Knight

Best Documentary Short Subject

What the critics are saying: Smile Pinki

What I'm saying: I haven't seen any of these, so I have no clue

Best Live Action Short Subject

What the critics are saying: New Boy

What I'm saying: The Pig or Auf Der Strecke (On The Line)

Best Animated Short Subject

What the critics are saying: Presto

What I'm saying: Man, these were all excellent... I kinda lean towards La Maison en Petits Cubes, but also could easily see Lavatory - Lovestory and This Way Up taking it home. 

A Southern Boy's Adventures in LA: Ben vs. The Walt Disney Concert Hall

So I finally got the chance last week to visit the Walt Disney Concert Hall.  For the uninformed, it's the home of the Los Angeles Philharmonic Orchestra and also one of the most uniquely designed buildings in LA.  Envisioned by renowned architect Frank Gehry, the WDCH has been used in countless films and commercials (among them: Get Smart, Iron Man, Fracture, and the upcoming Robert Downey Jr./Jamie Foxx film The Soloist) and is a prominent land-mark here in Los Angeles.  It's no secret that I'm in no way a student of classical music, but I do appreciate it, and along with ballet, opera, art museums, and other such "high-brow" artistic endeavors, I seek to learn more about it, and so for the longest time since moving here I've wanted to attend a concert inside the Hall.  I only live a mile from this magnificent building, and after months of deliberation, I finally found myself presented with a free ticket to see a concert there.  This wasn't just any concert either.  Oh no.  This was Jazz vocalist Patti Austin singing the Gershwin songbook, and she would be flanked by a big jazz band, including a small string section and also the essential jazz quartet set of piano, upright bass, and percussion.  All in all, it was everything I could ask for.  

The interior of the WDCH is every bit as elaborate and imaginative as the exterior, and the main hall itself is a pleasing array of wood carved seating areas and a massive pipe organ that practically defies geometry the way it protrudes from the wall.  The acoustics are amazing, the seats are relatively comfortable (a little more leg room would have been nice) and all in all, it's an experience that every person who lives in LA or comes to visit for any amount of time should have at least once.  The concert was awesome, albeit Patti couldn't resist making some obligatory political comments about how her new black president was gonna protect her from racist white folks like me and how the whole nation is going to hell thanks to Bush and his economy.  Stick to the Gershwin Patti, that's what we're paying you for and what we came to see.  I don't give two cents about you (or any other celebrities) political views.  The best part of the evening (in my opinion) was when Patti was still back stage and the band opened with new version of the ever popular "Rhapsody in Blue".  Magnificent.  Music truly transcends all barriers... 

Anyway, yeah, I'm gonna put a few pics with this post so you can see the beautiful concert hall as I saw it, and hopefully on your next visit here I can take you to hear the LA Philharmonic.  Enjoy!    

A Southern Boy's Adventures in LA: Ben vs. The $1000 Tow Truck

It's so cool to see how God works.  This past week I got to experience what grace looks like in a very tangible, practical way.  Living in LA you simply have to own an automobile.  I guess you could use public transportation if you really wanted to, but this place is so spread out it's pretty much a given that you have to have a vehicle to hold down any kind of job here.  As many of you know, I brought my old 1995 Nissan Maxima out here with me.  Handed down to me by my father, this vehicle has a little over 181,000 miles on it and has been taken very good care of all things considered.  As it so turns out, this past week was a trying one for the old Maxima.  

I had just checked the mail and got a check for a little over $500 for my last job.  Combined with the $200+ dollars I currently had stashed away, this would more than cover my rent for the month and also give me a little something to live off of for food and gas.  Needless to say, I was excited.  February has been rough, work has been nonexistent and the whole industry is slowing down like an overweight jogger who bit off more than he could chew by entering that marathon race.  Anyway, I was in route to the Wells Fargo bank in Chinatown, which is my favorite branch for two reasons: It's the closest one to where I live, and the tellers there are so friendly... I'm actually pretty sure they are all in love with me because every time I go there they all clamor for my attention to go to their window, and then when I get there they all blush and say things in hushed and hurried Chinese.  Back to the car: I was driving along, when I suddenly detected a shuddering sensation coursing through the frame of the vehicle.  I knew this wasn't good, and could tell I was in trouble when I stepped on the gas and nothing happened.  I started to involuntarily grind to a halt in the middle of the road, so I quickly turned off the iPod and AC to divert all remaining power from the battery to the engine to simply keep me running.  

I swerved into a CVS parking lot and made it into a parking spot before my car just died out right there.  I put it in park, pull out the key, count to ten, then try to crank it up again.  Nothing. Uh oh.  This isn't good.  I'm supposed to meet a friend for a movie later that evening, and this isn't a good situation to be in... I find a guy who's kind enough to jump me off with some jumper cables.  From there I'm off to the nearest mechanic, right?  Wrong.  I try to keep on rolling towards the library, where I have to return some materials before it's too late.  I end up in the center lane of a 5 lane road, right at the intersection of Broadway and Caesar E. Chavez Blvd.  (formerly Sunset Blvd.) trying to make a left turn on a green arrow.  Right there my car decides to die again.  Great.  It's rush hour, I'm in the middle of a huge intersection and traffic is surrounding me on all sides.  I'd like to especially thank the drivers at this point who speed by honking their horns, flipping my off, and cursing at me.  Gee, thanks so much fellas.  I sure do appreciate it, seeing as how I planned to do this you know... idiots.  Ah well, gotta love LA.    

I call my father and explain the situation, I'm upset because it's beginning to dawn on me that this will cost money to fix, and that's money I was about to deposit at the bank to pay my rent with.  I can't jump the car off again, (I try with the help of another kind soul who pulls up next to me), whatever the case is, the battery isn't holding the charge at all.  I can't push my car out of the intersection (I mean, I know I'm freakishly strong and all, but seriously, I'm one man and this is rush hour traffic on all sides here...) I'm going to have to get a tow truck either way, so I call a few different places.  I found out that the LAPD is apparently running a racket with the tow truck companies, because the first guy I talk to wants $1000 to put my car on the back of his flat-bed truck to take me about a mile to the mechanic.  Yes, there are three zeros after that one, and yes, I told him to forget about it and hung up on the fool.  I wasn't born yesterday you know... 

I end up finding a guy who will do it for $40.  Looks like that's the best deal I'm gonna get, so I hesitantly agree and he tows me to Radi's Mechanic Service right off of where I live on Sunset Blvd.  A few hours later I've walked home, leaving my precious vehicle in the clutches of a mechanic who I don't know for them to fix it.  The next morning I get a phone call and they inform me that this will cost about $400 to fix.  On one hand, I have the money.  On the other, that was my rent money.  This is one of those moments where you really want to wake up from a dream (more like a nightmare) but are troubled to find you are awake and this is reality.  I sigh and tell them to go ahead, I mean, after all, I need that car to live and work out here.  

Later that afternoon I pray.  I pray hard.  I need money to pay for this AND get me through the month, not one or the other.  I hop on everyone's favorite social networking website (facebook!) and chat with a few friends.  Within about 20 minutes I'm humbled to learn that God has provided someone who want to pay for my mechanic bill.  Wow.  You really can't begin to know how I feel.  I mean, here I am, simply telling someone what I've been through when they ask me "what's up" and within a few minutes, they've offered to foot the bill for my frustrations.  I never even asked them to or expected them to.  Talk about a clear picture of grace.  They didn't want me to pay them back - ever - they wanted to give me the money as a gift and cover all my expenses for me.  Wow.  God sure is awesome in the way He answers prayer.  This one He happened to answer quickly, and I'm forever grateful for His providence and provision to meet my needs.  

And to my secret benefactor, whose name remains a secret per their request, I hope the Lord continues to use you to bless others.  Thank you so much for letting Him use you to bless me.  I now have the car back and money in the bank just like the whole incident never happened.  Talk about the goodness of the Lord... I feel that this is a little picture of what the gospel is like.  We're given something we don't deserve from someone who certainly doesn't have to give it to us, and yet He does.  We can't pay Him back, otherwise it ceases to be a gift.  The struggle is to live freely in that grace, and not become a slave to the feeling of indebtedness and try to work our way to a point of paying back our benefactor.  Once again, when that happens, it ceases to be a gift.  We just have to realize that we're not in control of the giving, but must be obedient and grateful with a heart of praise in the receiving of such a gift.  It's beautiful really.  God used this individual to express His love and provision to me in a small way, in order to help me better grasp the big picture of just how great of a debt He has paid for us.  Thanks be to God for his faithfulness...

To My Valentine...

I struggled whether to post this yesterday or not, but decided to go ahead and put this up here anyway.  Let my friends judge me if they want.  I don't care.  I'm not sure who you are, or even if you are.  There are times when I feel that I'm called to a life of singleness, that perhaps the marriage train is just gonna pass me by, they I'll spend my days consumed with other things and never know the fellowship of an earthly helper suited for me.  Part of me actually wants this, since by all accounts it may make certain stages and decisions in life a little easier if I didn't have you and your well-being to worry about.  Truth is I feel more often that the opposite is true; that you do exist, and that's when things get freaky.  I start asking myself if I've even met you yet, what you look like, and how our lives are going to intersect according to God's timing and purposes.  

I'm not the kind of guy who gushes all of his insides out concerning relationships.  I have my views that I express to those who are interested, sure, but I have a deeper level too, a reservoir of feelings and expressions of myself reserved just for you.  One day I'll allow you inside that reservoir, but as I said, I'm not about to talk about some of that stuff here where the world can read it.  That's special and only reserved for you.  

I hope I can be the man I ought to be to win your heart.  In fact, please don't settle for less.  I know it won't be easy, but there are very few times in life that I have found that the right thing to do and the easy thing to do are the same thing.  I'm scared to let you see my faults and weaknesses, even though I'm fully aware that I have them just like everyone else does.  I like to appear like I have all the answers and everything together, so please bare with my stubbornness.  I've still got a lot of growing pains to go through in the area of sacrificial love, to learn to care about someone or something more than myself.  I humbly pray that I can be the man I know I'm called to be Biblically, to be there to serve, to protect, to provide, and to lead you in our relationship.  

I pray for you all the time.  Like I said, I'm not sure if you're someone I already know that I'll eventually discover I've fallen in love with or perhaps you're on the other side of the planet and we've not even met yet.  Regardless, I pray for your purity.  I want you to be attractive to me, and not because of your clothing or body or anything else that draws attention to yourself, but by your reputation and good works as a Godly woman.  I realize that this is a tall order, but I'm swinging for the fences here.  If you're that kind of woman, it will be a long hard road for me to win your heart, I realize that.  But that's the kind of woman that's worth pursuing.  One that doesn't attract the attention she deserves but instead she deflects it back to the source that gave it to her in the first place: the Lord.

As I said, I know I have miles to go before I'm qualified to handle your heart.  In many ways I think I'm wise enough to know that at this point in my life, I'd be a terrible person to handle anyone's heart.  Perhaps that's why I've stayed single my whole life up to now.  Perhaps I'm still punishing myself for the mistakes of my past.  Whatever the case, I know it's only by God's grace that every morning I'm able to wake up and claim that which I know to be true.  I'm not even sure if any of this makes any sense or why you're still reading it.  I guess I'm struggling to put into words what I imagine it will take a lifetime to express to you, both by words and actions.  I fully acknowledge that we're going to have our ups and downs.  I only pray for God to grant me the wisdom and understanding to properly handle those tough situations when they arise, and also to acknowledge the giver of life in those times when the going is good and we are blessed with plenty.  

I truly feel like every day since my salvation has been a gift, and God willing, it will be a gift that I can one day share with you.  For what it's worth, I can promise you that so long as God gives me the strength to do so, I will fight for you and for your love.  

And yet, believe me when I claim that some of the hardest words I'll ever say are "I love you" since by all accounts I can never fully grapple and understand the source of such love, as much as I long to do so.  

I believe in the sovereignty of God, and so until I get more comfortable sharing these kinds of thoughts, I'll just have to keep trusting that He's got all the strings in his hands, and He's weaving a masterful tapestry with our lives.  Will our threads cross soon?  Have they already begun to be woven together?  Are they never destined to intersect?  These are questions for which I do not yet have the answers.  But I know the one who does, and so I will keep my eyes and heart fixed upon Him, in so much as he enables me to do so.  I pray you will too.  May He alone bring us together according to His plans and purposes, for the glory of His name and renown to the ends of the earth... 

With my whole heart, found only in Christ,

Ben