So the picture you're looking at was taken by someone else. I tried to do that whole thing where I lean back and aim the camera at myself holding it at arms length, but it never came out well enough, so eventually I had to have someone else take the pic for me. Who was this mystery photographer you ask? Why, a rather jovial Jewish fellow I shall now tell you all about.
To begin with, this all started when I was driving around town one day. I figured I needed to go around and snap a few pictures of myself with the classic hollywood hotspots on prominent display, that way I could get that touristy bit of myself out of my system, and also it would just be kinda fun to go around and see the sights of LA. The Walt Disney Concert Hall, The Staples Center, Dodger's Stadium, Grauman's Chinese Theatre, The Kodak Theatre, All of these were among the famous LA/Hollywood landmarks I had to track down for a photo opportunity. The most famous of which however, and the quintessential picture for anyone who ever visits the area, is one of the Hollywood Sign. Sitting atop the mountain looking down on the city, the Hollywood Sign has become the symbol for the film industry. Long has many a film student been inspired by the uneven white letters sitting atop this mountain, right up there next to the Griffith Observatory. I just knew I had to get as close as possible for a picture. Well that's the biggest problem with the Hollywood Sign. It's tough to get close to it. Almost any picture you attempt to take of it will leave it feeling small, insignificant, and distant, especially if you insist on being in the frame as well. On a whim I did a GPS search for The Hollywood Sign and it actually came up as a tourist spot. I decided if there was ever a way to get close, follow the GPS to whatever view it gives me. Sure enough, the GPS takes you right up to the base of the mountain, with the letters looming overhead. I looked ahead and saw the road continue up the mountain, and figured I could get closer. I ended up in a dusty parking lot on a dirt road labeled "Holly Ridge Trail". From here on, I would be on foot. I hiked in only about 300 yards beyond the parking lot and rounded a corner to see the Hollywood Sign dead ahead of me. This is about as close as you can get to it for a decent picture, so I figured I'd give it a shot.
After about 10 minutes of attempting to do my own self-portrait, I hear a noise coming from below me on the trail. It's the sound of a man laughing. I wait, and within a few seconds, the source of the laughter comes into view. A rather large Jewish gentlemen, complete with black dress pants, white dress shirt, and little yarmulke sitting atop his head. A large black beard covers half his face, and he squints through thick glasses. He's grinning from ear to ear. He has with him a very petite woman who doesn't look Jewish... in fact she looks like an escort... very elaborate make-up job, high heels (yeah... she wasn't really "mountain-ready" here folks) and a tight little cocktail dress/miniskirt combo. I don't want to judge, but the looked like a very odd couple. Whatever her relation to the man, it was obvious they were in love (or at least lust) because they were all over each other. Constant hugging and kissing... kinda to a point where you wanted to tell them to find a room. Long story short he said he wanted me to take a picture of him in front of the sign, and I agreed. I positioned him and his girlfriend/wife/escort/female companion in the frame with the Hollywood Sign right above him, and snapped the picture. I let him take a look at it before they broke the pose, asking him if the angle was OK and he was satisfied with the picture. He gave me a real serious look, and said he didn't like it at all. I was kinda taken aback, and inquired as to why he didn't like it that much, to which he simply responded "My nose is too big". I couldn't figure out if he was joking or not, and was kinda afraid to laugh until he cracked into a wide grin and let out a deep rolling belly laugh. A Jewish joke from a Jew. I guess they can get away with it the same way black people can tell black jokes. Anyway, he laughs real hard and lets me know by way of a hard slap on the back that it's not my fault his nose is so big. He points to heaven and chuckles, "Yahweh gave me my large nose!" and then bursts into fits of laughter again. I join in, a little nervous and trying to gage just how much I'm allowed to ham it up with him while he pokes fun at his own ethnicity. He proceeds to take a picture of me, which as I said, is the one you see here, but I'll never forget the large, laughing Jewish man for as long as I live here. It was truly an LA moment.
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